The Complete Shut-Out
This is one of the least understood stress differences
between men and women. A man will completely shut
everyone out when he is under extreme stress or needs
to find a solution to a serious problem. A man totally
disconnects the part of his brain that controls emotion,
goes into problem-solving mode and stops talking.
When a man uses the complete shut-out, it can be terrifying
for a woman because she only does this when she
has been hurt, lied to or abused. A woman assumes that
this must also be the case with a man - she must have
hurt him and he doesn't love her anymore. She tries to
encourage him to talk but he refuses, thinking she
doesn't have faith is his ability to solve his problems.
When a woman feels hurt, she shuts off and a man
thinks she needs space and so he goes to the pub with
his friends or cleans the carburettor in his car. If a man
completely shuts off, let him do it, he'll be fine. If a
woman shuts off, there's trouble brewing and it's time
for deep discussion.
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